Ugh! I really wish you'd spend time with your kids. Ya you work full time, but atleast make some effort for them. Otherwise you're just like that loser

OMG

okay.. so you're still trying to contact me, but i'm just not ready to talk to you. or do i even wanna try and talk to you and then get let down again & you be mad with me. it's like i will have to watch what i say to you now. so yup, i'm not ready to speak to you.. don't you think what you did to me hurt me too?

can friday come already. i'm really not looking forward to getting a year older, but i'm anxious to go eat out.....

alright

okay so i pretty much got the idea that this person doesn't want to be my friend anymore. let alone saying i have to leave her friends alone as well. okay first off, i don't understand what i did wrong. and i apologized for the wrong doing even though i'm confused as to why. but i was the bigger person bout it. well this did go on for months. over 2 months i must say.. well after getting that email saying never to email & leave um along... i said my peace and said i'm gonna go on with my life & you go on with yours. clearly there wasn't anything more i could do...... well the next day i get an email saying she's willing to forgive me even though i hurt her feelings. and that she thought long and hard about it... okay so how is that possible when just the day before she said to leave her and her friends alone... does she not see that my feelings got her too, and did i get an apology for that? nope. so since i haven't emailed, she then emailed me again asking if i got the email. well yes i did but i'm just not ready to reply. yes, i know things won't be the same. but give me time to think this through. i mean when i said my apology the first time and you were over it.... really, you weren't cuz a few weeks later you were mad at me again.. so i just don't know what i should do..

Hmmmm.....

Okay.. So i'm absolutely confused.. i'll write about it laters. i was going to write about it now, but i changed my mind.. :)

appointment

Today i went to the doctor's for my post opt appointment since having Kaley. It went by so quick that it made me forget to ask some questions... The nurse asked all these questions to me and cuz she was asking them so fast, it didn't give me time to think things through... Then when I saw the doctor same thing.. So after leaving I was like my hips hurt and duhh forgot to ask bout that. But I've healed good.. I could go back to work already but I decided I'll take my time and go back when I'm supposed to for c sections.. 8 weeks. so 2 more weeks w/Kaley then it's back to work. I really would just like to stay home w/her all day, but duty calls, and I need to bring in the dough again! Being out of work since Jan w/no money coming in.... Not well at all..... Backed up in our bills since Feb.

But on the brighter side of things, I asked when having another baby if I need to do a c section again, and he said most likely no.... And I could do a natural birth again! Yay, that's good to know. As much as I wouldn't mind doing a c section cuz I can choose who the dr will be.... I rather do the natural labor again.. Cutting me open and healing....... Not in my vocabulary... I'm glad they dosed me up good w/the pain meds so I really didn't feel anything but alittle tugging. And watching those birthing shows on tv doesn't make me want to go through that again. I can't even watch that. Let's just hope when we have the next one, the dr I was seeing throughout my pregnancy is still there. I did tell Kelvin that I would like to have another one before I turn 35. But 3 is enough for me...

Okay that's it for now!